Is marriage counselling really effective?
Marriage counseling can be for couples at any stage in their relationship, before marriage or after marriage. There are no restrictions on who can attend. In today’s blog, we’re going to look at if marriage counseling is really effective.
What is marriage counselling?
Marriage counselling is a form of psychotherapy that aims to allow couples to express their emotions freely. It can be used by people attempting to strengthen their relationship before marriage, while they are having minor issues in their marriage or while they may be considering separation. It is important to note that while your counsellor can advise you on certain aspects of your relationship, they will not advise you on your future with your partner. They are available to provide new techniques and skills to help you decide on the future of your relationship.
If your relationship feels as if it’s suffering, you should ensure that you don’t wait too long to face those issues in an effective way.
Couples attend marriage counselling for a number of reasons, sometimes they are looking for a safe space to discuss their feelings or they are wishing to improve their communication skills. Whatever the reason, marriage counselling could be really effective for your relationship.
Is marriage counselling really effective?
Marriage counselling has come a long way since it was first introduced. It has been found that ‘couples therapy has a positive impact on around 70% of those who attend’. This number has increased by 20% since the 1980s. The practice involved in modern day counselling has been improved so that long lasting results are created for the couples involved.
Marriage counselling can be considered more effective if both partners want to attend, they are both willing to learn new methods and they both want to attempt to fix any issues that may be occurring within the marriage. This is not to say that couples where only one partner wants to attend will not be successful in their counselling journey. Your counsellor will work hard to ensure that both partners leave the sessions having achieved what is necessary.
Counselling will not dissolve the issues in your marriage, but it will allow you to learn new ways of coping and dealing with them. The most effective therapy sessions are when both partners are calm and collected. The counselling session is a safe space for couples to explain the way they are feeling and why they might be feeling this way. This is not likely to be effective if both partners are trying to blame each other and are angry and therefore not willing to share their emotions.
Some say that marriage counselling can be more effective based on a range of factors, such as:
- Your age – you may find the sessions more beneficial if you’re a younger couple, as you are more likely to be inexperienced in marriage and therefore may have not learned all of the communication skills that are deemed important.
- If you are genuinely still in love with your partner – it’s normal to experience issues with someone but still be in love with them. If you still want to love someone then it’s likely you’ll benefit from the counselling sessions, as you probably still want to continue your marriage.
- You can accept fault – No one is perfect, we all make mistakes sometimes, but if you’re willing to accept when you’re at fault, you’re in a good place for counselling. However, counselling is not about blaming each other, it’s about working through issues together in a positive way.
- If you’re willing to accept change – Change is inevitable. The fact that you’re attending counselling means you would favour change in your relationship, which is a really good starting point. Be prepared that changes in your relationship will require time and commitment.
Accepting that you might benefit from couples counselling can be a really positive experience. Ensure that you find a counsellor that you feel comfortable and confident discussing your relationship and emotions with.
We offer effective marriage counselling at Imago, if you would like any more information, please don’t hesitate to contact us today.