What happens when you go to marriage counselling?
Marriage counseling is a positive experience for a lot of couples. It allows both partners to express their emotions and deal with any issues that they might be experiencing within the relationship. In today’s blog we’re telling you what really happens when you go to marriage counselling.
First of all, it’s important for you to appreciate that attending marriage counseling does not mean that your marriage is failing. In fact, it can be a sign of strength that you want to build on your relationship in a positive way through learning new methods of communication and ways of dealing with issues in your marriage.
Marriage counseling is generally a short-term experience. The counsellor’s job is to assist you on a path to strengthening your relationship. You can learn a lot from the methods that they’ll teach you, but ultimately, it’s up to you to decide the future of your relationship. Your counselor will not advise you on this.
The first step of marriage counseling is admitting that you either want to resolve an issue or that you want to build a stronger relationship with your spouse. Sometimes this can be tough, occasionally one partner may want to attend, and the other partner may not see the reasons for attending. You should make sure that you are clear with your partner, to make sure that they understand the reasons for your suggestion of having marriage counseling. At this stage, you would begin researching highly skilled counselors. It might be worth having a conversation over the phone before you commit to anything, so that you can get a feel of whether the counselor is right for you. This is really important, you must ensure that your counselor makes you feel comfortable and at ease, you need to be able to express your emotions freely.
After you have selected a marriage counselor, you will have to meet them for a consultation. It is unlikely that you will receive any counseling during this session, as it’s more important that the counselor gets to know you on a personal level. Don’t worry if you think it’ll be difficult to open up to a stranger, you will find yourself feeling more confident when discussing your emotions as time goes on.
In the second marriage counselling session, you will be expected to state the reasons why you feel that your relationship would benefit from the counseling. This is a key step in the marriage counseling process, it allows your counselor to consider the most efficient ways that they can help you. You may be asked to discuss your background, childhood and other personal topics. This can sometimes be helpful when a counselor is looking for ways to explain some of the issues in your relationship. These topics can be hard to discuss and a good counsellor will understand that, so take your time and say what you can.
Following this, your counselor will ask you to select a day and time for your future sessions to be held. Having the sessions on the same day each week can make it easier to fit into your lifestyle. It is likely that it will make you feel more comfortable too, because you’ll know exactly what’s going on and when. In the following sessions, your counselor will give you several opportunities to talk things out with your partner in front of them. This means they are there to offer any guidance if you need it and also provides a safe space for both partners to discuss their emotions freely.
Within your Imago Relationship Therapy marriage counseling sessions, you will be taught ways to communicate with each other in a more efficient way using the Imago Dialogue process. You will receive advice on how to grow through various issues and you will be shown ways that you can build trust in your relationship.
Many couples find marriage counseling effective, whether they are having issues or not. Sometimes it’s nice to have a safe space, with a third party who can support to you both. Remember that your counselor will never take sides, they have to take a neutral stance.
We hope this blog has been helpful, if you need any further information on what happens when you go to marriage counseling, please do not hesitate to contact us.